I have to admit, I doubt my scale lately. It doesn't seem as reliable as it once did. Possibly, this is due to my dogs using it as an extra boost up to try to look out our bedroom window. But, Saturday, the scale said I weigh 203. 203! This is truly exciting. I weighed myself three times at different spots in the bedroom, and backed up by the tape measure and the way my clothes fit, I'm choosing to believe it. It gives me a boost in my weight loss efforts, and if it isn't true yet, then I guess that it will be soon.
I have to confess: I would truly love to be less than 200 lbs for the new year. Four pounds away doesn't seem like much, but you know how you can get caught in a struggle or plateau. Also, the holidays are fast approaching, which will mean really paying attention to what I'm eating and how much I exercise. But, I'm resolving right here to do the best I can to hit my first big goal by January first. If I eat reasonably and stay on excercise task and I still can't make it, then so be it. But, I am going to try!
For fun, I went to My Virtual Model, to see what my big goal, 137 lbs, would look like. It seems that their Virtual Weight Loss model feature isn't working anymore, but I put together a before and after. The problem is that she doesn't look much like me, but there you go. Imagine blond hair for the bangs and some cat eye glasses, and we're getting closer. If anybody knows how to photoshop, take a crack at her.
My ticker isn't exactly accurate anymore. Since my visit to my parents', I've put on 5 lbs and then lost 1. So, I'm at 210 again. Now I ask you, why? Or really, I've been asking me. Was the idea of breaking 200 lbs somehow too scary on some level? At first, I was just lazy about getting back to my lifestyle changes. I was still in vacation mode and cycling seemed inconvenient. Unfortunately, my walking backup plan failed, because it was getting dark by the time I got home from work. And there were too many meals out followed by special desserts. The evidence is in the tightness of my new jeans.
I didn't go completely beserk. I didn't bring home sweets and eat them wildly. On Halloween, I gorged on Annie's Bunny Grahams instead of candy. I continued to eat fruit. But, I haven't done was was needed to lose or even maintain my weight.
I'm back in the saddle, but I obviously need to delve into my emotional relationship with food and body image. There were days during the last month when all I thought about was food. It was like when they say that teenagers think about sex every three seconds. I would think about eating. I'd be at work, and every moment of downtime I'd think how I wanted to eat something. Obviously, that's not food hunger. They were times when I think that I could have eaten cupcake after cupcake and never have felt satisfied. This wasn't consciously connected to anything bothering me. But, when I talked something over with my husband that had been brewing in the back of my mind, I have to say that I noticed that the compulsive eating thought disappeared the next day. Connected?
Then, I was ready the January 2010 issue of Shape magazine, and on page 107 they had a short article: "Don't let Your Feelings Make You Fat." They had some helpful tips, but they also mentioned several books that I hope to find at my library.
I've been trying to follow the negative reinforcement pattern when I overeat, focusing on how uncomfortably full I feel afterward and how I wish I'd made a different choice. But I have to tell you, I ate a whole frozen pizza last night. Not a gigantic one, but bigger than a personal size, with a cracker crust, sauce, cheese, pineapple and (fake) bacon bits. When Kristian brought it out for me, I thought to myself that I shouldn't eat it all. But, I didn't take steps. I didn't remove a reasonable portion and refrigerate the rest. I knew that I would feel guilty after I was finished eating, but I still did. It tasted really good. But, not that good. Now I've asked Kristian to help me in the future by only serving me some pizza, not a whole pizza. I'm too weak to stop myself in that situation. It only makes sense; that's why I don't bring candy or other pre-life change sweets home. Why test yourself unnecessarily?
Also, it looks like my workplace will be providing access to weekly lunchtime Weight Watchers meetings not far from my building. It still costs money and I'd have to talk to my boss about getting that particular lunch period, but if ever there was a convenient time to do it, it's now. What do you think? Maybe I need an extra boost going into the holiday season.
Now, here is some good news. Kristian and I adopted a cat this weekend. We got her from the Humane Society and named her Maisy, middle name Rae. She is 7 months old, 5 lbs, and very sweet. So far she seems unafraid of anything, which is great. We don't want her to be intimidated by the dachshunds. Maisy has a cat tree inside a gated play area we've set up in the living room, so she has her own space. I'm so glad we found her! I've really been missing having a kitty.
We did our Zombie Makeup 101 program for teens at the library this week. The incredibly talented Gabriel Wimmer came to Zombify us. I was thrilled to be a creature of the night!
Because it feels like one. Up and down the ladder. Bend and stretch to paint. That's how I spent most of my weekend. But, it was so worth it. I've been dying to change the color since I moved in. It's gone from a Velveeta cheese gold to a match to Behr Provence Cream (a Butter Recipe Golden cake mix shade, prebaked).
I was able to devote my entire Saturday to painting, because I knew that I was going to see Great Big Sea in concert that evening. They are my current favorite band and I love to work out listening to them. They make me peddle faster. I went with my friend Mickey,who had never heard them but was game. We had a fine time. GBS did two sets and two en cours. My husband calls GBS my "horrid Celtic music", but I beg to differ.
It's been awhile since I wrote, but I'm soldiering on. A vacation to my parent's house and a little excess celebration after I returned have brought me back up to 207 lbs, but I'm fighting with myself to stick to my goals! Honestly, the changing season makes me want to eat and sleep. I've had mad cravings for apple treats (as in crisp, cobbler, pie, baked, etc)and for waffles. The early darkening evenings kick my outdoor walking in the shins, so it will be more indoor bike time for me. Maybe it's time to get that hula hoop that I've been promising myself.
In the realm of pretty Etsy clothes, I've found some beauties:
Doesn't this make you want to dance? The Rita Hayworth Vintage 1920s Pink Sequin Dance Costume!
Sadly, It has sold, but here's the window shopping info anyway:
" ♥ THE most beautiful sequined vintage tap dance costume!
♥ Lovely salmon pink in color. Black ruffle trim, and layer underneath!
♥ Industrial hook-eyes in the back!
♥ Comes with matching garters! Due to age, the ribbons are somewhat falling apart on them, mostly in the back."
So sorry, but I can't find the information on this one:
The Ultimate Goddess Gown 1915 Titanic Draped Grecian Silk Lace Dress Edwardian Antique Designer Mint condition from Vintage Glitterati
"A simply stunning and very hard to find Edwardian Pleated and draped Silk Crepe and Lace dress from the Edwardian Era. Beautiful and stunning in multiple floating layers of silk, with a corset interior, dripping lace front and back, and antique lace applique at bodice front. Low cut and svelte. This gown is a collector piece and is in fabulous condition...We added fluttering lace applique streamers."
I did a bit more clothes shopping this weekend, and I made a great find at Lane Bryant- the basic pencil skirt. I have been looking for this simple style in a basic color for a long, long time. It fit me perfectly in a size 18 (happy dance!) and even though I'm 5' 2", it hits me at the top of my knee. Hooray! I also bought it in heather grey. I like them so much that I may go back and buy them again on faith in a smaller size. I also got two fitted t-shirts, in navy and berry red and a pair of black tights. I hope that they fit well. I can't stand being strangled by hosiery and usually wear stockings. Do you have a favorite brand for plus size tights?
My other purchase was at the grocery store. I tried Fruit 2 Day in Mango peach, and I really like it. I almost didn't buy it, because my husband said it's better to eat your fruit than drink it, but I grabbed it at the last minute. That is a fine philosophy in the summer, but soon I'll be finding nothing but apples and oranges at the store. I know that I'm exaggerating, but as the season goes on, it will feel that way unless I'm creative. Anyway, I was happy with this juice, because it has big chunks of fruit in it. It was really refreshing and ideal for after a workout. At 120 calories, I'm okay with it! Find nutrition information here . Other flavors are Strawberry orange, Cherry grape, Pomegranate blueberry (next on my grocery list) and Pineapple banana (which will never cross my lips; I hate bananas!), plus two special edition flavors yearly.
I weighed myself today, and I still weigh 209. I suspect it's because we've been going out to eat a lot and because my exercise bike is temporarily out of order (there's a place on the cord where the wire is showing- not good!). In order to keep myself more aware of what I consume on a weekly basis, I joined Calorie Count because it's free and because it seems to have some of the name brand and restaurant foods that I eat. You can also record your daily activity.
What are your experiences with these websites? Do they help you?
Addition 8:05 PM: I did not eat homemade apple pie today. I did not eat homemade cinnamon rolls today. We had a potluck at work and my co-workers brought them. I wanted them. I really did. But, I ate red grapes instead. Ordinarily, since I already "officially" weighed myself for the week, I might choose one and indulge. But, I don't think that I would feel good afterwards, I can't bike it off and I'm too lazy to innovate other type of exercise tonight. Also, there's Spooktacular to think about, with Sunday weigh in. Thanks, Spooktacular. Thanks, Karen!
I've decided to join the lovely & creative Karen at Muffin Fixation and other hard working bloggers in getting Spooktacular by Halloween! Find the details at Muffin Fixation .
In honor of the upcoming holiday, and to remind me of my fashion goals, I've got a special treat for you from Etsy:
"This dress is constructed from a semi-sheer light pumpkin orange fabric. The neckline shows some hand-stitching, but the majority of the dress is machine stitched. The skirt of dress is constructed with some 2" wide ruffles. The waist is belted in black waxed cotton to give it some stiffness. Adorning the bodice is a black cat creeping along. The sleeves each have a bat. The front of the skirt has 3 bats. The back bodice features a pumpkin and a bat while the skirt has 2 bats. These adornments were crudely cut from black fabric and tacked on. The dress slips on over the head."
Isn't it cute? I'd like to have this just as a sweet Halloween decoration.
Our plans for Sunday night fell through, so I was pretty much on my own for much of the evening. I decided to do a Bollywood night, starting with a workout and followed by a movie. Are you familiar with Bollywood? It's India's answer to Hollywood and many of the movies feature songs and lots of energetic dancing.
I checked out the Bollywood Burn workout from my library. Here's my summary for you:
What is needed: No special equipment. Room to move around, taking several steps forward, backward and to the sides.
Structure: Three fifteen minute dance routines, progressing in difficulty. 47 minutes total.
Special features: Freestyle dance performance. Audio options of music only or music with instruction.
My impressions: I watched this through once and then did the first two workouts.Workout done by two women and a man. For a Bollywood feel, the instructors are barefooted and rather glamorously dressed, with plenty of sparkle. I was not, wearing my usual sports bra & shorts ensemble with tennis shoes. The first segment is a warm up, and the second is faster, with some dance choreography. It involves a lot of jumping and kicking. I'm not comfortable doing much jumping (which is ridiculous for someone who wants a jump rope, eventually) so I tried to follow along with less impact. It looked fun, and maybe it would have been better if I would have done what they were doing, but slowed down it had the feel of old Jane Fonda aerobics for me. The instructors are very graceful, bouncing around lightly, but I have to say I felt elephantine, clomping around in my sneakers. I was also somewhat disappointed in the music; I thought it would have a little more flavor. These are just my own reactions, of course, but I don't think that I'll be doing this workout again.
I had a better time cycling to the Om Shanti Om CD, lent to me by my considerate coworker Floating Lush , who encouraged me to watch Om Shanti Om to begin with. The super energetic music gave my workout a push!
Six couples in different stages of their relationships are off on their Honeymoon trips on a tour bus. From a reluctant and sobbing bride and her clueless mate, to a freshly married mid-life couple,to a seemingly perfect pair who have been together since childhood, we learn their stories and empathize with them while also enjoying the film's lighter moments and song and dance numbers.
All in all I spent a very pleasant evening. Do you ever do themed workouts?
"This is a wonderful 1940s black cocktail wiggle dress. Short mini sleeves with a unique cut for the collar. The material is a blend of lace and texture. Cinched waist for a bombshell hour glass silhouette. There is a very unique gigantic side waist bow. Back metal zipper for closure."
50s Chiffon overlay party dress in hawaiian print from Redux Delux :
"50s fully lined dress in a teal and white Hawaiian print floral chiffon overlay. Gathered rouched front waist, metal side seam zipper. "
"The cafe au lait color cotton print has pale pink and cream flowers and leaves and features 2/3 length sleeves with openwork details, a v-neck with multiple layers of fabric, and soft gathers at the high waist.
Over the hips, front and back, is a diagonal pattern with cream trim, and an A-line skirt with front and back pleats to the hem. There are home-made ribbon like shoulder pads made from cotton fabric and cloth belt loops, but no belt."
Old Hollywood 1930s peach sheer garden party day dress from: Dolly Bird's Vintage :
"This dress...This 1930's long cut on the bias gown is a real original. I've never seen another one like it. Gorgeous puffed sleeves with a slit down the middle that create a super billowy appearance and create a capelet effect at the shoulders. Delicate ruching at the neck and shoulders, front and back and a sweet robins egg blue velvet ribbon detail at the neck. Ties around to the back of the neck with one button and a keyhole opening. Snaps up the center of the back. Beautiful flowers bloom out of the center front of the dress and more pale blue velvet ribbon drapes around delicately to create a belt that snaps in the back. This is one of the most ethereal and glamorous dresses i have ever come across, the colors, the details, the everything! I'm in love...so dreamy. This peach color is my favorite thing about the 20's and 30's. To die for!"
by Linda W. Craighead
by Karen R. Koenig
by Linda Spangle, R.N.
by Pavel Georgievich Somov, Ph.D.
workout from my library. Here's my summary for you:
, lent to me by my considerate coworker 
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